A Musical Weekend

Well the three job lifestyle is coming to a close, with only one more class meeting left this semester. I've really enjoyed teaching, but will welcome the extra room in my brain to focus on my other two jobs more effectively. Having three jobs, with many huge projects in process at any one time has been veeeeeeery taxing on my sanity. Somehow I've pulled through, and even got the opportunity for some fun this weekend!

On Saturday night, my piano teacher held a concert at Fresno Piano. It was so motivating to see her play. I feel very fortunate to have a teacher who is so enthusiastic, paired with such amazing skill! She played some classics, including my favorite Clair de Lune by Debussy... I am so motivated to learn it now.

Then on Sunday night, Nanda's younger brother, had a concert at the Saroyan theater. It was the Fresno Youth Orchestra paired with members from the Fresno State symphony or something like that. Anyway, they played Mahler's Symphony #1 which is the "titan" theme. It has always sounded to me like a depressed Frere Jacques, but I really loved it. They were pretty incredible, especially considering how young some of them are.

My goal this week... to keep my sanity, practice piano, and continue enjoying the little things.

Can I take a breath?

Well judging from the weeks it's been since I updated this thing... life has been a little insane lately. Three jobs have been keeping me very busy. Making sure I continue to give 100% effort into each has been increasingly difficult. At least I love what I do... otherwise this would be misery.

I'm especially enjoying my teaching opportunity at Fresno State. It's been so different to be giving exams instead of taking them. I was just as nervous giving my first test as I think the students were taking it. It worked out just fine, with a nice even spread of grades... a lot of A's!

Then of course there's always Billy hovering about with his fertility calculator plotting on how he can make my life even crazier by introducing a mini me into the picture. I just don't know what to make of that just yet...

Livin' la vida... ummm busy?

So... obviously been busy. Haven't thought about blogging recently due to my near constant work schedule. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do... but everyone needs some time off. Sadly we can't afford it. We have too much house remodeling to do, and too many credit card bills to pay off.

Luckily I enjoy my work. The only problem is that it is starting to become a bit of a strain on Billy and I. When I get home from working 12 hours... I want to relax. Not have to do chores around the house. Unfortunately when you live with another person, their idea of tidy is usually not the same as yours. I've become a bit of a kitchen cleanliness Nazi as of late.

So... I suppose I'll just suck it up and continue working insane hours. I like being able to afford nice things, I just don't like the constant stress of it. At this point, I can't imagine fitting a child into this schedule, but I guess normal people don't plan all that out first. I suppose I could think of it like people used to... if I pop out some kids, that's more little people to force chores upon! Woot!

Ok... so that's my griping session for now.

Good luck bringing me down!

So I'm really excited about my real weekend! I got all of my patients out of the way on Friday and had all day Saturday and today to do... NOTHING! Well I guess that's not entirely true. I did do some gardening and cleaning which was much needed. I had time to indulge myself in my new favorite TV show... the ridiculously cheesy True Blood. Funniest show ever.

I'm just really happy with my life right now. I don't think I've ever been happy for so long on a stretch. I think the key for me is staying busy. I notice if I have too much free time I start to dwell on things that are less than positive. Oh poor me I work too much, oh poor me my mom is crazy, oh poor me Billy's going to be out of work soon. It's only through years of training myself in positive self talk that I can overcome all of these things. I now know that I am stronger than anything this world can throw at me. So good luck trying to bring me down... it ain't gonna happen! So in the meantime... back to some more vampire dramedy!

Santa Cruz

Have you ever been driving on the freeway and wished that you didn't have to stop driving? Have you wished that you could just keep going to the mountains or the beach? Well Saturday night coming home from Lowe's I thought... sure would be nice to drive to the beach. So, instead of driving I decided to stop at home and see if anyone else wanted a part of this madness. So I called hotels in Santa Cruz, found one right by the wharf that was 1/2 off for the night cuz it was so late. I asked Nanda, Billy, and Kristin if they wanted to go. Unfortunately Nanda couldn't, but everyone else was game... so I booked the hotel, packed, and off we went at around 9:30.

We arrived in less than 3 hours and checked into the hotel at 1:00 AM. Kristin and I walked on the beach before bed and got stalked by a weird man who somehow knew we were from Fresno. It was creepy since no one else was on the wharf. Near the hotel we got freaked out by a weird dummy on someone's roof... who puts a freaking dummy on the roof?

So that was scary... I am having the hardest time trying to post pictures on this blog. I can put the first one where I want it... but all the pictures after that keep going back up to the top of the post... what's up with that?

Anyway the next day we walked to breakfast, ate delicious seafoody omelettes, then walked the boardwalk. We were early so we only had to wait a few minutes to ride the big dipper. Let me tell you that thing was no joke. I was actually quite scared. A man on the ride said I should label myself with an "S" for screamer. I think that means it's been too long since I was on a roller coaster. I never used to get scared like that.

We then walked down the wharf, I got an incredibly awful sunburn on my neck. Good times. Then like an idiot I put on my sunblock but it was probably too late by then. We checked out of the hotel, then drove along Cliffside road I think it was called. It was gorgeous as this picture proves. Then we drove South to have lunch and found a less populated beach to relax on. It was really the perfect temperature for a beach day... at least on the beach that was farther south. I'm so glad I was impulsive Saturday night... cuz this weekend was so much fun! It just feels good to do something last minute... especially if it involves the beach!

So the plan for this week? Work. I am working after work every night this week... sigh. That does mean more money though. We were able to pay the installer to put in a special moisture barrier so we should have the floor in the dining room done in the next few weeks...whenever someone can be here for the install, so yay!

We're on TV!

There is going to be an upcoming episode of 0-5 on PBS, and David (the other speech pathologist where I work) and I are going to be in it talking about stuttering. Should be interesting to see how the segment turned out. Hopefully they didn't edit me to sound like a moron. One of my previous patients is on the show and we are demonstrating the response cost method of treatment for stuttering. It's on PBS on Thursday at 7:30 according to the website. Here's a link.

More Speech Pathology Ramblings...

I had a great moment with a patient that has aphasia. This patient... I'll call her Susie... has severe expressive aphasia with some receptive involvement, although not as severe. Here is a video of someone with Wernicke's Aphasia... which is a fluent aphasia like my patient's. It's black and white... but it was really the only good one I could find on the internet that really exhibits a fluent aphasia. Anyway... back to Susie. She had a stroke and damaged the part of the brain that controls language. With aphasia this damage occurs in Broca's area or Wernicke's area on the brain above. So imagine being very intelligent, having the same personality as before, being active, having perfect emotional responses and great problem solving ability... but not being able to communicate! This patient can't read or write either. Imagine feeling that isolated all day long from friends and family! The worst part is that people think these types of patients are just crazy... but they are far from it. Many of them can even understand speech but just can't use language expressively, or vice-versa. There was a moment today where this patient had a breakthrough and named 15-20 objects correctly and then counted objects from 1-4 correctly all in a row. It makes my existence on this earth worthwhile when a patient looks up with tears in their eyes with a look that screams "I did it... thank you" without having to say (and being unable to say) a single word.

Q-Bert and Jasper, together at last!

After reading K's blog I couldn't resist posting a side by side comparison of Jasper from Twilight and Q-Bert...the resemblance is uncanny! They both look perpetually shocked and a little psychotic.

Well, in other news... I actually participated in a piano recital on Wednesday which was super funny. Most of the participants were of course younger than I was... but my whole adult class participated which made it slightly less embarrassing. At least I'm not the oldest! Anyway, so I've decided that since I've been playing piano for almost a year that I'm going to step up my game. I'm planning on either dropping the group class or adding a private lesson to it so that I can develop my skill a bit quicker. I'm proud for sticking with it this long, and feel like I have a new talent to show for it! Yay! OMG... embarrassing link here... Apparantly there is a picture of me on their freaking website. They showed it to me and I just about flipped out.

So Billy is WoWing again... I stand by my decision to have dropped WoW in favor of piano. Help me be strong! I have a new talent instead of an extra talent point for WoW. Was that a ridiculously nerdy metaphor or what?

Allow me to introduce the larynx...

I'm pretty excited about the new opportunity that has presented itself recently. I was offered to teach a class on voice disorders and fluency at Fresno State in the Fall. I thought about this quite a bit... taking on a third job probably isn't something to take lightly. I decided though, that an opportunity like this is not to be missed.

This morning I asked David, another SLP and my supervisor, if he'd be interested in taking on some of the responsibility and he basically said no, he had no interest. He did say that he'd help with pointers, etc. and even let some students observe him if need be. So I called my old professor back and gave him the news... that I'm in! So I should be signing a contract soon for teaching in the Fall semester. I'm very nervous because I feel like this was just me a few years ago in these classes! He assured me though that it might be a unique perspective to see a young professional now back and teaching. It's gonna be so weird to be the reason for other people's stress during finals instead of the other way around.

Here's the course description out of the catalog:

 CDDS 115. Disorders of Fluency and Voice (3)
Prerequisites: CDDS 80, 95, 101, 102. Normal and deviant vocal productions; introduction to assessment and treatment principles of analysis, measurement, and management of fluency disorders in children and adults. (Formerly CSD 115)

Sounds pretty exciting. Shaping young SLP's of the future! 3 hours of hearing myself talk. I can't wait to say "Allow me to introduce... your friend and mine... the larynx!" I can't wait to educate about the voice and spread the vocal fold love... now is the time to teach while I'm still young and passionate... it was all the old bitter teachers that made me want to cry. Right? Just give me 4 pets and say this was a good decision...

San Francisco and Ghostland Observatory

I had an amazing time in San Francisco this weekend. Ghostland Observatory was fabulous again... they really put on a good show. The picture I posted looks blurry for some reason, even though it's not blurry on my computer. Any techies know the reason for this? Anyway, they played a full show with all of my favorite songs (except freeheart lover unless I was too busy getting stepped on by the weird sweaty guy trying to play pogo on my feet to notice.) We were up pretty close amidst all the action. I was drenched with my sweat and the sweat of other Ghostland lovers... yummy!

There was tons of free stuff you could buy with little tokens they passed out. I got a poster, a hat, a cassette tape shaped coin bag, and a USB jump drive. Score! I did have a few drinks, which went against the whole eating healthy fiasco... but I figured it was Ghostland in San Franciso so I said to hell with it.

The next day we were up at 9:00 and began our exporation of the city by cable car. First we went to breakfast, then were were in line for cable cars... good times! We sat by some funny people who said they had lived in Hanford (was it Hanford or some other unfortunate little city in the valley?) We decided this was Fresno's motto... "Fresno: It's not Bakersfield." That made me laugh. 

We trekked on at Fisherman's Wharf heaing toward the Aquarium of the Bay. We went past the bush man that scares people in San Francisco from behind a bush. Yes he has his own wiki page! I could have watched this guy for hours. Thank goodness for Youtube. Apparantly the Bushman claims to make $60,000 a year for this! 

The Aquarium was actually pretty exciting with tunnels that you walk through where you can look up and see sharks, rays, and a lot of crazy undersea life all around! We stuck our heads close to an octopus and got to pet a ray and a little shark. Then we had clam chowder in a bread bowl and walked to get free samples from Ghiradelli. Yum! It was so cold over there, but a welcome break from the heat of Fresno. Another exciting adventure!

I always thought Billy was Lemur-like...

I always thought Billy looked a bit like a lemur. Now scientists think they found the missing link in the evolutionary tree connecting small monkeys with larger apes like chimps. This lemur apparantly has some ape-like qualities like fingernails, oppposable thumbs, and relatively short limbs.

This is a pretty fascinating development, but all it does is raise more questions for me. I've been struggling with melding my scientific knowledge with spiritual knowledge for quite some time now. Evolution makes much more logical sense to me than does a creator that has existed for eternity. I have been told "we aren't able to understand the infinite, you just need to have faith." This worked for a period of time during high school, and in fact I was very religious during that part of my life. I've never really stopped believing in God; I still feel like there is a possibility of a higher power. It is all just so confusing for me. So, I've just resigned to not know for sure. The only thing I can do is continue to uphold the most important Christian values, because I definitely believe in values. I also think it's important to have some sort of spirituality, no matter what it is. Love thy neighbor, do unto others... seems like a good idea whether Jesus rose from the dead or not. Lately I've just been more inclined to believe that a person's biology and past experiences dictate where their life will head instead of a higher power or destiny.

I don't know how this suddenly became a blog on religion, but oh well. That's what you get when you start typing without having an outline in mind.

Sexy Spock

I love Zachary Quinto on Heroes... but I saw the new Star Trek yesterday and thought it was amazing. Who knew spock could be sexy? The movie brought Star Trek some amazing action footage with really believable effects, along with a very interesting back story on these characters that we've known since we were little. Thrilling and nostalgic... I'm a happy camper.

Over 100 Degrees and no AC...

It's a sad sad day in the orange room when it's over 100 degrees outside and the AC won't turn on. I think all we need is a new thermostat, but I'm no expert. I tried wiggling it, popping the batteries in and out, and then just hitting it maniacally. None of these tactics helped.

All I can do is keep jumping in and out of the pool. I spent the morning working, went to lunch with Kae, then did my paperwork at Barnes and Noble.  Then I expect to get home and rest in the AC... what an unpleasant surprise that was.

Look-alike Ravioli

So there is a ravioli up on ebay that supposedly looks like Adam Lambert, one of the finalists from American Idol. I can't stop looking at this listing, it makes me laugh soooo hard every time!

Here is what the person listing had to say:

ADAM LAMBERT RAVIOLI!

So I was eating at a local italian place in my neighborhood and as I was about to finish my last ravioli, I looked down and seen what was the most beautiful/bizarre thing I could have even imagined....my last cheese ravioli had taken the form of ADAM LAMBERT! This was totally coincidental and it belongs beside the MOTHER MARY toast or whatever else.

If you would like to own this ravioli that has taken the form of the greatest idol contestant of all time ( ADAM LAMBERT ) then please bid.

The best part is, this ravioli is going for 1.75 and has 4 bids already! Unbelievable.

Things like this, little moments of comedy are what I love most about life. Living in the moment, relishing the little ravioli-filled moments every day.

Removal of necrotic tissue...

Necrosis of tissue: Necrosis (from the Greek νεκρός, "dead") is the name given to premature death of cells and living tissue. Necrosis is caused by external factors, such as infection, toxins, or trauma. ---- Thank you wikipedia.

Now if, using science, I relate the necrosis of tissue to the unhappiness and stress in my life... it is easy to see that the elimination of necrosis-causing factors "external factors, infection, toxins, or trauma" in my life can cure the death of my happiness. Therefore, the elimination of negative factors/people from my life should end in an increase in my own personal happiness level.

Somehow it's easy to see what I should do based on science, but doing it has proven to be much more difficult. I have, however, made a decision to eliminate certain people from my life in hopes of reducing the stress and unhappiness in my life. It has worked so far. Over the past 2 days, I've been relatively stress free. I've enjoyed more time with Billy, my music, and friends that I care to see and who I feel are positive influences.

Looking back, I do see a pattern regarding my need to "help people who need it." I tend to scoop up the lonely, the angry, and the hurtful because no one else will. 5 years ago, that resulted in me being assaulted and witnessing an attempted suicide. It happened with my father, and I saw it happening again. Not on the same scale, but it was hurting me, and that is enough justification to end it. Helping these types of people makes me feel needed. I've now made a conscious decision to stop this, because it borders on co-dependency. Now I will only invest my time into people and endeavors that are beneficial to my personal growth. Selfish? Maybe. But it's better than falling back into the blackhole of depression that I knew 5-6 years ago.

Blogs From the Orange Room... A beginning.

Why do people blog? Are they vain and like to think that people will care enough to read their innane ramblings? Maybe... maybe not. I suppose it doesn't really matter if people read it. It is an outlet. For me, maybe a means for me to stay sane with some healthy self expression. I used to keep journals but it is so cumbersome to carry around a journal. The internet is always with me. Computers, phone... eternally connected. So many means of self-expression. So it begins... blogs from The Orange Room.